Friday, December 01, 2006

Keep it Funky Friday

"Dear Mr. Toilet I am the Sh*t... got these other haters pissed cuz my toilet paper thick..."

This is a time to vent and will do as the theme for Friday... on the radio they got soapbox Wedsneday which serves as a verbal beat down to anything on your mind... so this is where I turn into a internet thug and attack the weeks issues with my own standpoints....

Number 1: People in my class... I could easily blame these people for a bad grade, who complain that they don't want to be there so late... I payed for this class and I believe that if you sign up for something , you always have the option to quit. For instance there were like 5 slides left in the teachers presentation... One side of the class (the old heads) wanted to be done and out of the class... i honestly dislike some of those people because they think cause they know everything. You've been here a lot longer than the rest of us but don't jeopardize my GPA... The new breed (the other side of class) has a lot more enthusiam to be there. I'm in the middle, Ive been school for a year the old heads 1 1/2 and new breeds 6 months or less... I'm in the middle because I know how classes can lag all night long but there might be a certification question that could have me fail.

The verdict: Quit, don't come, You pissing me off and you get on my damn nerves, I'm with the new breed this time because you never know what the test holds, the teacher's defense "Your responisble for everything in the book." That bullshit the book is 450 pages due your job and stop being a lil ole bithc when it comes to making people happy... I could take it to the dean and have your ass yelled at cuz you want to please the people who want to leave and go lay down.

Number 2

Okay you never know anybody's situation but don't complain about a job... when you have 2 or more holla at me. Mofo's be talking bout I took a nap and I'm just real tired... My schedule has no such thing called nap. I try to keep busy or I try to maintain a busy lifestyle. People who don't like there job, or boss, or hours quit.

Verdict: Shut the hell up! plain and simple, We don't believe you, you need more people.

Number 3

People who read this blog, yea you, stop sending emails, there's a comment section, my email is for business and private use only... If you have a question or a PROBLEM with what I say come see me or leave a comment its not the hard, just click comment hit the appropriate marking section and critize away. You cool for coming but computer illiterate for not commenting. I still love you tho.

Verdict: Comment

I wanted to post some other things but the time is not right, I have a lot on my mind but the day will come when you hear them.... Other than that enjoy the weekend cuz I know I will....

" You will be on a future episode of Maury or Cheaters the way your going..." Earl (On somebody else)

"Live today so yesterday will be jealous..." ib

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Call Me If You Miss Me...

" It's been a long time, shouldn't have left you without some nieces and nephews..." Timbaland

Ambolue (Inside Joke)

Whats up my people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Uncle Ian feels like an Uncle Tom at a Brady Bunch Convention. Oh my goodness... First my copy of Martin Season One will be arriving as the release date and my new job is gonna be cake. Oh man today was a good day. Woke up and felt like junk... Went by just how I planned. Doctors appointment, pay check, meetings, then my walk thru. I feel like a million dollars... Like dude John Mayer, I wanna run thru the halls of my high school. A nucca is real amped but today ends with a nutriton test that has a whole lot of acrynyms.

So I met the lunch ladies I work with and they were all country like: OHH a Man! like they haven't seen a finer speciman as myself in years... If I play my cards right I won't have to work hard at all... benefits are riddicoulous... They got benifits that even cover your dog. Personally I don't own one but when I do that little nigga is gonna be healthy as a bitch. Or she'll be healthy as a bitch... no pun intended. They all wanted hugs, I guess they think that I know gourmet or something but with their supplies its pizza and cheese burgers daily. The recipie I promise will be up next week so stay posted.

The Prinicipal told me to take my hat off and where's my student ID... I grinned and she said gosh your young... So maybe I could go back an be the star Quaterback again. The school is 2400 student body with 180 faculty about 900 eat so its not that bad... I'm amped I'll be there 6 am Monday Morning so you know I gots to sleep Sunday.... Yo son I feel like swimming in the Brandywine (hell nah, I don't want any pieces of me falling off)... But you know what a nucca mean... Them little 14 yr olds was peeping too... I ain't leaving the kitchen unless a bear ( a 800 lb one) attacks the kitchen cuz you look or bump into one of those little girls you will definatley be talking to officer Moody (on duty state trooper) Other than this I gots nothing... I love ya'll...

" Dear Mr. Toilet this job is the S*it..." Lil Dayne (Remix Version)

Stay Blessed, Holla Atcha Boy!!!!!!!!

Monday, November 27, 2006

You Should Really Stop Doing That...

"If you see the look in my eyes, you see I be a gangsta till I die" 50

Hope your holiday was good... mine was great, I'm riding cloud nine, I guess with all that's going well for. Hope it keeps up like this to bring me into the new year. Cuz last years new years was me owing my former housing complex $700. F*ck it. Today had me preparing for a new job and planning the coming weeks ahead, so I don't get caught up or fall behind. I drove a hour away to get fingerprinted. They got this digital screen that reads all the stuff r ight there, I was fascinated by the technology. I wonder if a alarm goes off, if somebody who commits a crime comes in. What if it did, It probably be like some N*gga Alarm. All the walls would drop and like 30 cops would run up on you with billy clubs.

Well thats not my story. My point is this epidemic that we black folk call "dancing". Now I've participated in this coonery for far to long. I'm going back to the two step because its simple and goes to any music. My first one I have a problem with is the infamous Jim Jones "ballin" jump shot. Its not in the video and I didn't see it until I went to a party at DelState a few months ago. Ya'll know what I'm talking bout... Now everybody is doing it... The New York Giants do it after a celebration (that was cool) the kid I mentor does it when he proves a point (okay, a little much) the old black lady in the supermarket today (wait a minute). I was shocked, I almost peeed my pants (not really, it was funny as hell tho). Not only did she not have all her teeth... She had on FUBU. Next thing you know they gonna be doing it in church.

You Know they will, I saw a girl poppin her back in church one night... its cool because we all knew her ass was at the "porty" last night. Yea I said 'porty'. I saw one dude doing the pop lock for Jesus this one time it was crazy. I'm so serious.... I've seen the running man, the heel toe, the "Tabernacle Shake" (Harlem), even the Motorcycle. Next up Chicken Noodle Soup with some grape juice and a craker on the side? That lady made my day... She said something to this younger looking girl and was like "ballin". I went thru the stages of Shock, Laughter, then Denial. The Shock part was like that did that just happen moment, then the damn that was kind of funny, and Like wait a minute I was doing that at homecoming. BET favors this connerism. They show all that junk all day and then be like stop the violence.

Another thing that bothers me is the grill epedemic. I took my Menttee to the flea market ( he wanted some BAPE gear, I know its fake but when you young it doesn't matter til the kid at school say something slick then you at recess fighting for your mama's attitutde for saving and you get suspended because your Nikes really were Sikes and the punk bully aint got a toothbrush to get the yellow crayon he was chewing off his teeth... flashback moment sorry). So I was browsing and I peeped a jacket that I would wear but what caught my eye was the grill shop. It was a little Chinese lady: my first thought was, she ain't got no DDS, my second was wear in the hell do you get fitted.... Supposedely I'm a herb, my menttee explained to me that you can pop those in. F*ck if I knew. Why would I do that tho? how many folk done tried these on? Thats nasty. Then it was the WTF moment. I saw a red neck, then a Mexican, then a 3 yr girl (you know she was black) on they wall of fame. I nearly pissed my pants again but I didn't I held my laughter into but I slipped a "oh hell nah" in there. Now I wanted one like a summer ago but one I wanted a real one and two I wanted to be done by Paul Wall or something not Chan Li's Grandma (I went to school with a Chan, so don't trip and call anybody). We need to stop all this mess.

If I ever catch my litttle sister with a grill I'll shake the coon out of her faster than a Mexican running thru a open gate in Texas. I have no problem with grown folk wearing them but don't put em in yo' baby "mouf". I think some women, I said some now, look better with em... it covers deformities. So on that note we ne need to stop this mess and get control. I am never against a good time but watch your grandmas and lil cousins.


"Yo her breath was smelling like hot garbage set on fire and then she licked some dog poop..." Big Mike

RIP to the Guy Who was Killed before his Wedding up in NY... My condolences in the air to his family.